I finally found where I belong (KNY, GenTan)
Genya and Tanjirou have been dating for three years already. Three wonderful years he treasures as his most important acquisition – because yes, getting to this point was a whole adventure for them, a journey full of misunderstandings and lack of communication they’re still trying to work on even now. Full of ups and downs, Genya came to the conclusion that all the struggle he went through was totally worth it.
And, also, he wouldn’t mind spend the rest of his life with Tanjirou.
Dating Tanjirou, living with him, knowing a bit more about him has been doing wonders to Genya’s heart. He doesn’t need the comments from his family and friends to understand he has been softening a lot since they live together, Tanjirou has taught him a whole different view of this world Genya started to adopt little by little, something he is very thankful about. His edgy years long forgotten now, he got used to the calm, domestic life inside the Kamado-Shinazugawa household.
To be honest, he can’t believe how he used to live before all of this.
It sure was a sad life…
Taking a look back at who he used to be before, who he is right now and who he wants to be for Tanjirou, he came to the conclusion he really can’t see a world without him anymore. And he knows very well Tanjirou is looking at the same future he sees.
That’s how after a longer than intended gay crisis he tried to handle by cleaning their apartment, he made the decision to propose to Tanjirou and promise him a lifetime of happiness and the best version of himself, even if Tanjirou says he’s already the best version and there's no need for change.
It took him a month and three weeks to plan everything. It won’t be big, not fancy either and, for sure, it won’t have people around because he hates when strangers stare at him and also despises the pressure people are exposed at when proposed publicly. If Tanjirou wants to reject him then it will be privately and far, far away from Zenitsu’s screamings.
Getting everything together without letting him know anything sure was a whole odyssey, mostly because Genya can, in no way, lie to Tanjirou, and having to hide something for him felt like his limbs being ripped from his body slowly and then turning everything in fire when he has to face those puppy eyes at the denial of any bit of information on his secret plan. He knew it was for the greater good, but that didn’t make things any less painful.
Aside from that, he didn’t tell anyone about it because all his friends are snitchers, all of them terrible at keeping secrets. Loyal to Tanjirou –just like everyone else, to be fair– they wouldn’t hesitate for a second to betray Genya and tell him the truth, being them the very reason why they’re here right now. When he acknowledged he had feelings for Tanjirou on his last year of college in a very heartfelt moment, which was a moment of trust and honesty, it took them a single day to go straight to him and tell him everything. He should thank them for giving him that little push he needed to get his shit together and confess to Tanjirou, but they made him feel so embarrassed the memory only gives him a bitter taste in his mouth.
He should, he knows that. Since then everything in his life has been butterflies in his stomach and the lighting in his life go from a dark, gray imagery to all the colors he could imagine.
Of course, not everything is perfect, but they had handled everything just nice.
For Genya, Tanjirou was something almost ethereal, every movement, every gesture, all the different emotions he let open to the world was stunning and inspiring. He saw in Tanjirou the most beautiful masterpiece anyone could have created; what he himself considered flaws were for Genya nothing but the astonishing reminder that the person in front of him was human and not an angel. He never once got tired of the blessing of his presence, the way his heart would beat up at a dangerously high speed every time he would greet him after work, he could still feel even today how his brain stops working on every kiss, every hug or every time they would hold hands.
Being with Tanjirou was falling in love with him just like the first day.
If his own self from the past ever saw him right now he would be completely grossed out and, honestly, he wouldn’t blame himself. He spent long, long years thinking he would die alone and hated as much as he could all the happy couples around him, even though he denied it back then, he’s glad it stayed as just a phase.
It took Genya several attempts to get Tanjirou’s ring size no thanks to him being excessively perceptive and a light sleeper, but at least he made it, now how he did it better stay as a mystery.
The engagement ring was very ehh for Genya, but he may be a little biased because nothing can really match Tanjirou’s beauty –and he’s being dead serious here man nothing can compare–. It was bathed in two colors, pink gold and silver divided in two long stripes that were intertwined, both hugging the small precious gem in the middle.
The first time he saw it, he realized how similar this simple mundane object was to their two personalities, so different yet so beautifully interlaced, complimenting each other and carrying together such a lovely story, keeping them tightly together and refusing to let go. He didn’t have to keep watching different options at the store after that, he knew this one was the right one for Tanjirou.
That ready, there was not much he had to do, just prepare himself mentally and practice his words over and over and over, knowing very well he was going to stutter anyways when the moment of truth were to come.
The day Tanjirou had a longer shift at job, making him arrive strategically later than usual, he gave the start to his plan.
He was going to make a romantic dinner at their humble apartment, place that gave birth to so many memories, all of them recorded in every inch from this place: on that questionable stain that they no longer remember if it was wine or soup on the sofa, the pics hanging on the peach colored walls, the table with four and a half chairs, the broken pot they had to fix because it was Sanemi’s gift and so on, all of these things carrying a bit of their simple, modest daily life. It would be really unfair to not do things here, to open a new chapter in the very place that started it all.
***
Everything seemed to be in place, neatly organized and bathed in the smell of the fall-scented candles they both love very much. He tried to stay calm, but it’s impossible to do so when you’re about to offer your whole heart and the rest of your life to the person you love so, so much it hurts. Watching every second pass and casually moving –once again– the plates a bit to the left and another bit to the right, changing the background music and walking around in his attempt of a formal attire –a lavender button-up and his favorite black tight jeans–, he heard the shuffle of Tanjirou’s keys before opening the door.
Walking rapidly in long leaps from the dining room to the entrance to their abode, he opened the door before Tanjirou even pressed a key to the door knob.
“Ah! Genya! Helloooo” Tanjirou stretched his arms to reach his shoulders and pull him down into a hug, sniffing his neck, trying to figure out what was so different in him. “You smell really good, are we going out?”
“Nah, it’s too late, we’re eating here.”
Genya moved aside for Tanjirou to step inside, closing the door behind him, he did a fast scan on the whole place, it sure does look different as usual... It wasn’t decorated, but the candles on the table and on almost every corner and the dim lights gave everything a whole different vibe.
“Am I forgetting about an important date?” he asked, worried.
Scoffing, Genya replied. “No, no you didn’t. I just wanted to do this long time ago-give me that,” he grabbed Tanjirou’s bag hanging on his side, big and heavy with his clothes and other stuff, half of them actually useful for work, the rest are just things he brings just in case. “You sit down there, I’ll be right back.”
Carefully dropping Tanjirou’s bag on their bed, Genya took a deep breath. You’re halfway there, just a little more, he encouraged himself, heart rate already on extraorbital levels.
When he came back, Tanjirou was already sitting on his own side of the table, staring longingly at the window just few steps away, holding both hands together in front of him, another thing he always does – never, ever, under any circumstance, eat if they aren’t both sitting on the table. He would wait until the food is completely cold before eating alone, or eating before Genya. Even though knowing that very well, Genya still served the food before Tanjirou arrived, he’s absolutely sure he would mess up if he had to serve their dinner if his boyfriend was around, so it was just a preventive thing.
Once Genya took his seat, Tanjirou started eating, every bit accompanied by a small story from his day at work. Don’t get him wrong, he loves to hear him and all the weird stuff he finds on his daily life, but right now he can’t focus on anything else aside from his gorgeous face, decorated by those two bright red stars glimmering and reflecting the entire universe and those unfairly pretty lips, round and soft, glossy and smooth.
Boy he was so, so screwed for him. The outside noise would fall into nothing when he was with him, walking down the street, or even whispering on their most quiet and intimate nights, where everything around would lose its form, and any strong entity that started religions, wars, blessings and curses would fall and bow down to Genya’s enormous love for Tanjirou. It’s so easy to understand yet so complex too, how fast he can go from his default defensive mode into this, being ready, completely prepared to fight anything and anyone who hurts him or makes him face pain again in his life.
Even if he says no, he wouldn’t regret taking this decision.
“Tanjirou.” Genya interrupted his words, something about some kids playing with a stray cat.
“Hm? What’s it?”
“I, uh... I want to tell you something.”
“Yes?”
But before, he needs to make sure the ring is right there for him to speak his heart out. The ring that is supposed to be here , on his pocket, but isn’t there. And right now he’s sure he had three consecutive heart attacks, one after the other.
“Uhhh…”
Where did he leave it? How come he didn’t realize about it earlier?! It's the most important and expensive part of this whole plan! How can he be so goddamn stupid oh my god-
“Genya?”
“Y-yes?” he managed to answer in a calm tone.
“Is what you want to tell me related to this?” Tanjirou looked for something on his pocket, taking out the very reason of his distress, a small, red box.
“How did you get that-”
“Genya, my love. If it wasn’t because I was there, you were going to wash your jeans with this in your pockets.”
How many times? He doesn’t know, but Genya saw his life past through his eyes on a loop for as long as it took Tanjirou to finish that sentence.
Nothing much can be done now, so the only thing he managed to do was to facepalm and wish for this earth to eat him alive this second.
“Genya.”
“Tanjirou,” he replied.
He cleared his throat, “since we started dating, I’ve found in you what feels like real happiness. For the past three years, I thanked to all the gods for letting me in your life, for allowing me to know more and more about you and specially never give up.”
Genya stared in silence as Tanjirou continued with his speech.
“I love you, you know? And I’m sure what I feel now only grows bigger and bigger. I love you so much it hurts, it gives me peace, it makes me really happy. When I look at you, it’s like everything gets better, you’re amazing, and, I don’t know. Maybe I do want to spend the rest of my life with you. So-”
Are you kidding me-
“Will you marry me?”
