letters to the world (KNY, GenTan)

Read on AO3.



Dear Genya,


 


It has been almost two months since the fight against Muzan ended. It didn’t turn out well, as you may know already. But we managed to get Nezuko turn back to human, which ruined his plan completely, he forfeited and fled in the end.


I don’t know how to feel about this, to be honest.


My sister is back, but so many lives were lost, you included. My heart still aches at the thought of you not coming back ever again, my letter will never have a response, and it hurts, that’s for sure. On the "brighter" side, Zenitsu, Inosuke, Kanao and I are pillars now, which is something I really didn’t expect. Well, we all defeated an upper moon on our own, after all!


Even though I thought Sanemi was going to retire after this fight for obvious reasons, he didn’t. Bet you’re angry about that! He recovered to his peak form pretty fast, that’s really impressive. Well, he’s a pillar and he’s used to this, I guess?


The past months have been wild, we are still fighting demons as we try to regain our force for when Muzan comes back to fight.


The other day I was resting on a tree on the forest near our state and I couldn’t avoid but think about you. It felt strange, some sort of emptiness from not having you here anymore.


 


I’m sorry for not protecting you, Genya. I’m so sorry I failed you again.


 


…But when the news came to me, that even though your body… well, they managed to put a grave with your name near the wind state, I thought it may be the time I finally could talk to you. I always thought it was petty, to talk with your deceased loved ones. You’re literally talking alone! It’s weird!


But I miss you so much, I hope you’re listening to my words, Genya.


I will try my best to keep sneaking letters on your place, even if that means Sanemi will crush my skull into little pieces! I left some mochi here with you, hope you like them too.


 


                                                                                                                                                   Love,               


                                                                                                                                                                           Tanjirou.


 


***


 


Dear Genya,


 


After two months, I finally collected all my courage to write to you again.


Say, do you remember the promise we made back then on the rock state? That we would defeat Muzan together and protect each other? I do.


 


We didn’t defeat Muzan, and I couldn’t protect you.


 


 


How many times I promised you I would protect you, and in the end, I couldn’t?


 


I’m sorry, This was supposed to be a cute, all happy letter for you. Let me start again! Do you remember our first kiss? It was so clumsy, I still remember how red your face was back then, bet you still get all this flustered at the memory! At first our noses crashed, and it made such an ugly sound! the pain is still there haha


But it was cute, in the end. 


I still miss the warmth of your hugs back then. And your updates on your little bonsais, too. I wonder if Sanemi is taking good care of them? Maybe Himejima is teaching him how to raise them... Hope they aren’t stressing you out over this…


The memory of the times we spent together helps me gain strength whenever I feel down. That and Nezuko’s fast recovery.


Ah! did I tell you? She’s getting a lot better, still as sleepy as she was before when she was still a demon! Guess old habits never die, huh? Well, it’s still good for her to sleep all the time she wants, she needs to recover, after all. I will be taking care of her and defeat demons on my own, so she never has to face one ever.


I wish you could be here to see her, Genya. She’s slowly growing up, I didn’t expect her to get this big in just four months, really!  


This time I couldn’t make mochi, but Kanroji made some… pan…cake? Is it spelled like that? I don’t know, but anyways! She made a lot, and Nezuko told me to give some to you! Hope you like them!


 


                                                                                                                                                            Love,                 


                                                                                                                                                                           Tanjirou.


 


***


 


Dear Genya,


 


The past two weeks have been a wild ride, so I thought it would be a good idea to write it down instead of talk for hours with the wall. Zenitsu and Inosuke caught me talking with you the other day and I have to admit I felt a bit embarrassed, sorry for letting you all alone that time.


Anyways, the other day Nezuko told me she wanted to join the Demon Slayers Corp. I almost passed out, I think I did, actually. But that doesn’t matter.


She said she wanted to help me and protect me, and I felt my heart burn in pain.


 


It’s weird.


 


 


I understand how Sanemi felt back then when he saw you were a member of the demon slayers; the image is clear now.


The mere idea of Nezuko dying in the hands of a demon scares me to no end. I really, really don’t want her to join us, to risk her life on a daily basis, I don’t want that. But I can’t stop her and her desire to fight and protect people. I guess I will just have to make sure she’s alright! Zenitsu, Inosuke and even Kanao offered to help her and train with her so she could be ready and prepared for the final selection, we won’t go easy on her, that’s for sure!


Later after Nezuko made the confession, I got to talk with your brother. He isn’t all mean anymore, and most likely didn’t attempt to crush my skull when he figured out I was dropping letters every now and then on your grave, so that’s a progress.


He finally is allowing himself to laugh more, at first it shocked me, that’s not something you see all the time, it was so strange to hear a nice, genuine smile coming from your brother I almost made a wish on the spot, but I held back for the sake of my recent injuries. And, well, you would've get all mad if I even disrespect him, right?


To see him enjoying life like this, even though sometimes I can sense the bitterness over your memory, is reassuring. Did you say something to him, Genya? Did you get to talk to him?


Whatever you said, it seems like your brother got the message, and now, even though he fight demons every night, he seems less stiff, he seems like he’s slowly getting in good terms with himself. He has progressed a lot.


You two would’ve been an amazing duo together. You’d have been such an amazing pillar, the name as in is already cool itself. Imagine, the demon pillar.


 


It’s my fault for not protecting you that you aren’t here with us. I’m so sorry.


 


 


Today Sanemi helped me make some ohagi for you. We both left you this letter and the box, hope you like them!


 


                                                                                                                                              Love,              


                                                                                                                                                             Tanjirou


 


 


***


 


Dear Genya,


 


It has been a year already since the last time I dropped by. I’m sorry for not coming before.


Since the last day I came, for some reason I couldn’t collect myself to write a letter for you. I don’t know what went wrong, but so many unfinished letters are resting on our state with Nezuko.


From now on, I’m not really sure how much I can write to you. I don’t even know if I will ever get to finish this letter, but I will try, okay? I will try for you.


Nezuko is a demon slayer now, do you want to know what breath she can control? It’s the breath of the flame, the same as Rengoku! Isn’t that impressive? I’m proud of her, but it still scares the hell out of me to know she’s risking her life on a daily basis now! It’s really terrifying… But she’s really strong, though. Sometimes I worry too much, and she comes back unharmed, how does she do that? Ah, well, we weren’t really that soft on her during the training, it makes sense.


I met with Sanemi the other day... two days ago, I think. It was the first time he talked about you. It was… painful.


He told me even though he was watching from outside, he could see how you cared about us, and how much you loved me. I have to admit, the second part caught me off guard, I didn’t really know Sanemi knew that much.


But then he cried, and apologized to me for the fight we had back then, he had been suffering the consequences of his actions for so long, it made me cry too.


 


Your brother loves you so much, Genya.


 


Even when he tries so hard to smile and be gentle in your memory, he hurts so bad about the words he said back then, carrying this regretful feeling on his own all this time.


I kept saying sorry for not protecting you, but I never considered how Sanemi must be feeling the same, I apologized to him for being so selfish.


 


I can’t wait to see you again, Genya. I want to hug you so bad, I want to kiss you again, I want to see you, I really want to see you, even if just a minute, even if it’s a dream, please, come back.


 


Today I’m leaving some onigiri with you, one of them has a surprise inside!


 


                                                                                                                                           Love,              


                                                                                                                                                             Tanjirou


 


***


 


Dear Genya,


 


On our last pillar meeting, Oyakata-sama said he had a hunch that Muzan will come back with the intentions of defeating the demon slayers for real. He says it will happen this week, if not, the next one. But it will be sure around those days. He is very serious for someone so young, to be honest.


Now that we’re preparing for this fight, I thought it would be a good idea to write to you now,


                                                                     this may be the last time I write for you.


 


Sanemi also left a letter on your grave yesterday. This may be a "goodbye" from us to you, or, dare I say, a "see you soon"?


I don’t want to give it much thought.


 


As for the others, Nezuko has been praying all the time, Zenitsu is surprisingly calm, and Inosuke is really pumped up.


Kanao is ready to fight, I’m still impressed at how she is back to her peak form after losing the total vision of one of her eyes! That really takes time! I don’t know if I could ever do that, to be honest. I would’ve straight up retired haha


 


I’m sure we will win this time, Genya. For you, and all the lives we lost back then.


 


I would’ve loved to fight by your side for a last time, at least. But, you know. If we don’t win, and I happen to die. At least I will see you again, isn’t it?


 


 


This time I will leave some mochi with you, just like I did the first time I came to visit!


 


I love you,


                                                                                                                                                              Tanjirou


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